Are You There, Ms. Blume? It’s Me, Stephanie
“Why do they wait until sixth grade when you already know everything?”
― Judy Blume, Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret
Image courtesy of Unsplash
The ten-year-old version of me was scrawny, knobby-kneed, shy, and naive. I had a friend in sixth grade who seemed oh-so-sophisticated. I wore t-shirts, shorts, and sneakers; she wore strappy sundresses and cork wedge sandals. She knew things. She was worried that I did not know things.
So, in the spring of my fifth grade year, we hatched a plan for my education in the ways of the world. Carrie faked an ankle injury during P.E. Her grimace of pain and bogus limp were surprisingly convincing. I volunteered to accompany her to the clinic, and when the nurse left to get some ice, Carrie opened the supply cabinet and snagged me a copy of “Growing Up and Liking It,” the iconic 1957 pamphlet on puberty (already grossly outdated in 1980) that our school distributed to sixth grade girls.
Blooming flowers with smiley faces adorned the front cover, and in retrospect, I feel mildly offended by the forced happiness being foisted upon us by the editors. Did I really have to smile and like this whole journey into womanhood? What if I was entering the whole thing kicking and screaming as I left childhood behind? Sigh. I digress.
But the pamphlet contained the unmentionable things my friend worried I did not know. And no one was the wiser that I got my hands on it a year early.
“Did I know this happened?” my mom asked me last weekend. The “girls” (my mom, Izzy, and I) were in the car together on our way to pick up food for family dinner.
“Um, that would be a hard no, Mom. Absolutely no way would I have told you that! But I had to find out somehow!”
“By the way, I watched a great documentary on Prime Video last night. Did you know that Judy Blume is 85 years old and owns a bookstore in Key West?”
The segue to the Judy Blume conversation was natural because I, along with countless other adolescent girls in the pre-internet age, have the renowned and beloved author to thank for educating us in the um, well, the more sensitive issues of maturation and development.
As a young elementary school-aged child, I frequented the library as often as I could, and Judy Blume books were always my first choice. I devoured Blubber, and Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing, Otherwise Known as Sheila the Great, Superfudge, and all of the other books in the “Fudge” series. These books for younger readers tackled “controversial” themes including bullying, isolation, identity, racial slurs, and body image well before mainstream society openly accepted these topics as acceptable to discuss.
When I hit my junior high years, I would head to Eckerd Drugs in my baby blue angora sweater and Jordache jeans to buy lip gloss, Love’s Baby Soft perfume, and Judy Blume’s more “mature” books like Are You There, God? It’s Me, Margaret, Tiger Eyes, and Forever.
And let me tell you, many friends of mine had their copies of Forever confiscated by their moms, including me. It was like there was some secret “Mom network” where one mother got ahold of a copy of the book and found “the controversial parts.” Next thing you know, Linda called Jean and told her to read a certain page in the book, and then Jean called Judy, and then the next thing you know, Stephanie’s copy of the book disappeared, too.
“It’s a wonder you know anything at all about that three-letter word. I guess you wouldn’t have had it not been for her books.”
“Grandma! This is not good!” my daughter piped up on my behalf.
“I’m not saying it’s good! I didn’t do a great job talking about ‘the birds and the bees,’ but Judy Blume did.”
I remained silent on the book confiscation fiasco. She didn’t remember, and I didn’t want to relive the shame of it all.
I don’t think it was uncommon in the 1970s and 80s for parents to assume their children would organically learn the “facts of life” from siblings or other kids. Perhaps it was still unseemly to discuss such things as a sense of taboo pervaded the discussion of such topics back then, a holdover from the conformity and repression that dominated previous generations.
Image courtesy of Unsplash
Before the introduction of the Digital Age, we turned to books for answers to our questions, solace for our grief, and stories for our escape. Never bowing to controversy or censorship or shying away from tough topics, Judy Blume shepherded us through the trials and tribulations of puberty and adolescence. Generations thank you and salute you, Ms. Blume!
You can watch the documentary Judy Blume Forever on Prime Video. The movie Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret was released in theaters April 28, 2023. You can also visit her bookstore, Books & Books @ The Studios of Key West. where she often makes in-person appearances.
(This article was originally published May 13, 2023, in the Southern Spice section of the Times-Georgian.)
